Why didn't I tell her that I like her?
by Gilaureloth
Summary: One-shot: Missing scene from the season finale of Cristela - Cris goes back to Josh's apartment to offer him a job. (Josh p.o.v)


_Why didn't I tell her that I like her?_

He throws the last of his clothes into a box, not even bothering to fold them. After a moment, he pulls them back out and starts folding them, because he can't quite bring himself to leave them bunched up to get wrinkled.

_Why didn't I tell her that I like her?_

"Because she's going out with Ben!" he answers himself aloud, crumpling the shirt in his hands. He closes his eyes and tries to make the voice go away. Finally he loosens his hands and smooths out the fabric. He sets it carefully in the box and then sinks down on the bed.

He lets out a sigh and thinks back over the past year. He wishes he could say it snuck up on him, but it's not true. He'd been enamoured of Cris ever since that first awkward encounter. Not that he'd been thinking about her in _that_ way, of course not, but he thought she was funny, and obviously she was pretty. She'd been a great rival, until one day she wasn't. One day when he finally figured out that he wanted her to succeed just as much as he wanted it for himself.

_Why didn't I tell her that I like her?_

"Because I'm a coward," he mutters, running a hand over his face.

Of course at that point he'd thought they were just friends. A bit of harmless flirting, some sarcastic bickering, all stuff friends would do. And if the conversation sometimes got a little close to admitting they were perfect for each other, well, he didn't mind.

The thing is, it didn't stay that way. Day by day, as they bickered and flirted, and he watched her across the desk, he fell for her. He wasn't sure when, exactly, but he knew it was happening, and he'd hoped...

He gets up and starts pacing between the boxes, frustrated that his life is reduced to this - 20 boxes and memories of the strongest and most beautiful woman he'd ever met.

_Why didn't I tell her that I like her?_

"Because I thought she knew," he says, sitting on the couch for a moment before getting back up and pacing again.

Sometime around when she took him to the quinceñera, he realized just how much she had come to mean to him. He thought the dance meant that he meant something to her too, but she didn't seem to want to talk about it, so he said nothing. A few weeks later he tried to bring it up and accidentally talked her into dating Ben.

_Why didn't I tell her that I like her?_

"I _tried_," he protested, kicking the nearest box (though not too hard, no point in breaking anything).

He really had, too, in everything but words. Confronting Natalia was the scariest thing he'd ever done, but he did it anyway, because he knew that Cris _deserved_ to be a lawyer. And he'd thought for sure after she'd come home to find him sticking up for her, that would be his moment. Instead, she passed and he didn't, and now here he is, stuck getting ready to move thousands of miles away. He'll get over her, of course, but it hurts like hell right now.

A knock at the door interrupts the constant inner monologue. He looks up and stares at the door for a moment. Who on earth…?

He opens the door slowly to find Cristela on the other side. What was she doing here? They said goodbye, she _left_, and that was that.

"You're not going to change my mind," he tells her, when she doesn't say anything.

"No, I don't accept this," she replies, pushing past him and into his apartment, "You don't get to leave."

"I'm… sorry?" he asks confused.

"I have no reason to stay," he adds, and a traitorous voice inside him whispers that he only phrased it that way because he hopes she'll give him one, "And like I said, the deal with my parents..." A strange look crossed Cris's face as he said that and he paused, waiting for her snarky comment.

"What if I could get you a job?" she asked, defiantly. He sighs and looks away.

"That's very nice of you, Cristela, but I don't want to lay floors with Felix."

"What? No! I mean a _real_ job. At a law firm."

"How are you gonna do that?" he asks.

"If I get the job from Mr. Culpepper, I want you to come work as my assistant," she says quickly, cringing away from him as if afraid of his answer.

"What?" He's stunned. Stunned that she would do that for him, that she would even offer. If he had been anyone else he might have been offended - to go from being the shoo in for associate attorney to being that attorney's assistant? It was definitely a step down. But if he took it…

"You don't have to decide now," she adds, "Although you probably shouldn't wait too long, you know how Culpepper is-"

"Okay," he says, cutting her off. "I'll take it."

"What?" She seems surprised.

"I'll take it. If you get the job, I'll come be your assistant," he repeats with a half smile. She grins back.

"Good. Now unpack this stuff, because you are _not_ leaving. Meet me at Culpepper's in half an hour." And with that she breezes out the door, a smug smile on her face. He looks after her, slightly in awe.

_Why didn't I tell her that I like her?_

"Because it wasn't the right time," he says with a small smile. "But maybe soon it will be."


End file.
